State of the Marriage Address

I decided this year before our anniversary that Zach and I should write each other letters detailing how we thought the year had went and how we felt about the relationship currently...a "State of the Marriage" Address if you will (and even if you won't). I figure that's likely to be something personal that we should only be sharing between the two of us, but then I thought, screw it, I need material for the blog. So I give you an open letter to my husband, on this, our anniversary.

There are several key points which I believe should be addressed here tonight. But first, I'd like to thank everyone for being here and for taking time out of their regularly scheduled programming to attend this address.

In the last year we have had our ups and downs. I've provided for you a summary of those ups and downs with some analysis. Let me first say that our marriage is strong and that the prospects for the future are good. I've had several analysts weigh in on this issue and we are all in agreement that the union is strong and profitable.

The minister of emotional issues reports that there are increases in the following areas:

The Anxiety Index is on the rise. We've had a definite increase in the levels of homeland anxiety this year. As you know, one member of the marriage has contributed disproportionally to this rise. I'd like to take the chance to apologize for this situation. Some of our top people are currently working on this issue and we hope to have it resolved by the Christmas season.

Worry about health - up. Yes, it's true, much of the anxiety is related to various health issues. We have reports that we're healthy, though you might remember that some of our key worries about health include: teeth and gums falling out/rotting away, some form of horrible disfigurement (like mouth herpes) and of course, death.

It turns out that some other levels are up in the marriage as well. Love levels appear to be at an all-time high. Hard to believe that the love could have grown over the past years, but it seems to be growing still. I know that I personally cannot get enough of you. I'm always happy to be with you, even when I'm not (you know what I mean).

Compassion from both parties seems to be up. Included in this category is patience, understanding and commitment to seeing the other person's side. As you remember from our last status report we talked about these issues as being important to our happiness. I am delighted to report that these levels have been increased due to hard work and passion from both parties.

The minister of finance reports that levels of savings are up. I enjoy saving money with you and figuring out what to do with it later. I hope that we some day own a nice little house with a cute yard and garden and maybe some dogs.

The archduke (as you know, we lost the minister earlier this year...damn that Minotaur's lair) of health reports:

Health - down, but on the mend. As you know, we lost the gallbladder in March. It wasn't an integral part of the relationship, so I can't say that I miss it. But I am glad that we were able to weather major surgery and come out stronger (and lighter).

Levels of bickering, pettiness and anger seem to be down this year as well. This is an encouraging trend that I hope continues.

Overall, I'd say that our union is strong. There are positive things on the horizon. I hope that we continue to grow and change and love together. I believe that we will. I am so happy to be with you and feel super blessed to be with the perfect compliment for me. Thanks for always being there for me. Thanks for being the rock for me to lean on (I like to think I help you out too).

Always and forever (for all eternity :-),

Your Wife - Rose