Yet More Things I Find Disturbing

1. The Space Bag commercials. Have you seen these? It's sort of crazy. Not quite as crazy as the lady who is trying to sell me that stuffed sandwich grill. She's got the red hair. She's excited about the product. The other disturbing thing is that I've sort of always wanted the Space Bags. I wanted to buy a bunch to move with, but I was vetoed by Zach.
   
2. The lack of new shows on television currently. Obviously I know it's the off season or whatever, but I need something to distract me from reality. That seems unfair.
3. The pain in my foot. But that's ok, I'm going to the student health center on Monday so that they can look at it and tell me they don't know what's wrong and then refer me to someone else.
4. Humidity. Man, it might be 120 in the desert and that might be really freaking hot, but at least it's not 120 with 90% humidity. At least when you sweat it evaporates instead of hanging around and making you feel gross. At least everyone who lives in a desert has central air conditioning.
5. The amount of things I have to do and the amount of time I have to do them in. Some people aren't happy unless they are busy. I'm not one of those people. Give me the ability to sit around doing nothing all day and I'll be happy.
6. So-called White Noise. I hate background noise. Background noise like the incessant whining of the emergency generators that the erected in the parking lot outside my window. Does that make me a bad person? I don't think so.
7. My lack of posting. But you know what? That demon has to be put down for the day. I've got a ton of work to do (seriously, a ton) and I have to go teach in a bit. So that's it people. I'm out.
   

I May Have Been Premature

In my last post I stated that I was "Back and on the Attack". I may have spoken prematurely. I'm obviously not really back, nor it appears am I really on the attack. I was just speaking big and trying to impress you, but now I feel a bit guilty. It appears I'm not really ready to put my money where my mouth is, as the that old chestnut goes. But here's what's been going on with me. If you are interested:

• When we last left Z and I were going on a vacation with Z's family to Seattle and California. Successfully completed. Check that one off the list. We can discuss that more later. And I took photos, when I say "I", I mean, "Zach took photos". But I brought that camera and the memory cards and the batteries, so that's almost like I did it, right?
• When we got back from vacation. I took about a week to recover. The vacation was great. It was just a whirlwind, so I needed a little rest when I got back.
  
• Zach started his new job. A "permanent" job at the University Hospital Pharmacy. He's basically doing the same job he was doing before, but instead of working from 6:30 AM- 3:00 PM, he's working from 3 PM until 11:30 PM. He's adjusting well to the job and he likes it. I'm not adjusting as well. If I had my way, we'd spend every waking moment together, but now, we don't seem to spend quite that much together. Oh, whatever, Zach would tell you that we're together 14 hours a day for the most part, but I'm sleeping for part of that time.
  
• I started teaching my class. I'm in charge of the whole thing. If you need an introduction to cognitive psychology and you attend the U of Iowa, I'm your gal. I really do like it actually. It's just very work intensive and it's taxing to speak for 50 minutes straight each day. I'm sure you'd think I wouldn't have any problem, but trust me, it's tiring. But I do enjoy making the lectures and trying to provide the best education that I can.
  
• There was another natural disaster here in Iowa- this time a flood. A big, giant, inconvenient flood. I'll likely complain and rant about this again. For right now I'd like to just list the various horrible things that have happened in Iowa since I've lived here:
• Ice storms - knock out power and make it hard for me to leave the house
• Snowiest winter on record for a long time - again, stupid, crappy, not leaving the house
• Tornadoes- scary, frightening, can't leave the basement, F5 destroys at least one town
• Earthquake - seriously? Seriously, there are earthquakes in Iowa??
• Plane crash by my house - no, really, right down the street, heard the explosion, smelled gas, couldn't leave the block
• Flooding - yeah, classes canceled for a week, can't leave the house. Not a good time
• They canceled classes last week and no one could get to campus on the Friday before they canceled them, so I have 6 class periods that I now have to cram into the semester. That's not that cool.
• Keeping up with the whole wedding planning thing. Almost got that thing sewn up. We picked up my dress, crown, um, I mean, headpiece and veil yesterday. This weekend we are going to church class on Saturday for the day. That's gonna be awesome.
• Other than that, just working, missing Z, missing our neighbors (not the dinner-serving mormons, the other ones) who just moved out, working, eating gummy bears, being depressed about living in Iowa, working, watching British television, watching Twin Peaks, missing Zach, eating ice cream and working.

More to come, I'm working on it. I'm just very, very slow. But I'm always here for you.

I'm Back and on the Attack

Well, I'm back now. And I have so much to tell you. But I can't do it all right now. I'm going to have to pace myself. But I just wanted you all to know that I'm back and I'm going to start posting like a mad man, so keep checking in, I'm here for you.

Until I can get my act together and start churning out the stories please enjoy this video. It's honestly the cutest thing you will ever see. Yeah, yeah, you've looked into the eyes of your precious newborn, etc., but this is super cute. Seriously, click on link and enjoy that video.

Now is as good a time as any...

It seems sort of wrong that I haven't posted in forever and then I decide to post to say that I won't be posting for awhile longer, but them's the breaks folks! And for the 2 people that read this blog, suck it up! Just kidding. I appreciate all my loyal readers- tell your friends. Think of this blog as a pyramid scheme, the more people you can get to read it, the funnier it will be! Just trust me!!

Anyway, I can't form paragraphs today or use clever transitions (when do I ever, right?) so I am going to go with that fantastic stand-by - the list format. Don't fight it, love it!

1. On Friday, May 16, I had the oral defense of my comps papers. If I have not complained to you about the comps process yet, allow me to catch you up. I had to write to 40 pages papers on two topics not really related to my research. I defended them on Friday. I "passed with reservations" which means I had to rewrite two sections of one of the topics. A pain, but I suppose at least I passed.

2. I'm teaching a course this summer. That's fine. I'm excited. I'm not excited about having to find someone to cover the class so that I can have time to get married. It doesn't really seem fair. I wish I could just cancel class that whole week, but that'd probably be wrong.

3. Z and I are leaving at 3 today to go to Chicago so that we can fly out of O'Hare tomorrow to Seattle. A little family vacation with his family. Then we fly down to Oakland for a wedding at the end of the month. It should be good times, it will also be the reason I'm not posting, and I will try to bring you all pictures. We'll see.

4. I've packed one teeny, tiny suitcase with all of our clothes and such. I have a purse, small carry-on and Z has a backpack and that's it. I really, really stuffed a lot of things in there. I think it's cool, but maybe we'll have to take out some clothes and repack some things at Grandma's house before we go. I should have room for souvenirs. But you would all probably be proud of the amount of things I've been able to pack in that suitcase. Although I have to admit to the fact that one pocket of Zach's backpack is filled with socks. And a tie. And a bra. But still, I packed a lot of stuff into a small amount of space, go me!

5. I have a bunch of other stuff to do today. I was going to write more for this post, but I'm boring and time waits for no man. I still have to clean the bathrooms, dust and vacuum, pack up some snacks, pack the car and shower before I go pick up Z at 3, so I've got a real full day. Oh yeah, plus I have to take care of any last minute email work things. My life is so full it's hard to convey via the written word.

Anyway, have a great time yourselves. I'll be back when I can...and hopefully I'll have pictures and stories from the Pacific Northwest. End transmission.

More Things I Find Disturbing

That's right home audience, it's time for another fun installment of....THINGS I FIND DISTURBING!

1. The way my pee smells after eating asparagus. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. What the hell? That's not right. According to the keeper of all knowledge (the internet),

"The effect of eating asparagus on one's urine has long been known. Marcel Proust claimed that asparagus "...transforms my chamber-pot into a flask of perfume." Certain constituents of asparagus are metabolized giving urine a distinctive smell due to various sulfur-containing degradation products, including various thiols, thioesters, and ammonia. Derivatives of asparagusic acid are also found in urine. The speed of onset of urine smell has been estimated to occur within 15-30 minutes of ingestion. All individuals produce the odorous compounds after eating asparagus, but only about 40% of the population have the autosomal genes required to smell them."

-From Wikipedia

"Asparagus contains a sulfur compound called mercaptan. It is also found in onions, garlic, rotten eggs, and in the secretions of skunks. The signature smell occurs when this substance is broken down in your digestive system. Not all people have the gene for the enzyme that breaks down mercaptan, so some of you can eat all the asparagus you want without stinking up the place. One study published in the British Journal of Clinical Pharmacology found that only 46 percent of British people tested produced the odor while 100 percent of French people tested did. Insert your favorite French joke here________________________________."

-From the book, "Why Do Men Have Nipples?"- as quoted on the internet.

2. Getting information from the internet. Ok, so both those answers say similar things. Your pee smells because of some sort of sulfur that asparagus sneaks in your diet and both say that not everyone can smell it, but they have different reasons why that's true. One says some people don't break down the sulfur in the first place and the other says that people just can't smell the odor. Strange, no? Of course, I'm not really helping by sending this information on, but at least I'm cautioning you.

3. The fact that there is no soap in any of the bathrooms here at work. I'm not sure why. I'm guessing that they didn't order industrial soap in time or something, but that's not really a valid excuse. Now, I'm not as worried about me because I can muster up a tiny bit of soap from the dispenser (you just have to push, oh, 10 times and it comes right out) and I have a sink with soap upstairs in my office, but what about the little people? Not everyone has their own sink and soap. That means there are a bunch more people than normal walking around without washing their hands after using the bathroom. Oh, the humanity! Gross.

4. The fact that I have to defend my comps on Friday. It's been a month since I've turned them in. I feel so done with them and yet, I have the nagging horrible feeling of impending doom. Ridiculous. I want to be in the clear, darn it.

5. The clouds and impending rain. Neither of these factors really help me get into a nice head space for Friday, not even a little bit.

6. I graduated high school 10 years ago this month. How sick is that? That's sick.

That's it for now. There are others, but I should avoid getting too worked up.

P. S. I bought a wedding dress (really a bridesmaid's dress), a veil and a mini crown (tiara) yesterday. Now at least everyone in the wedding party will be dressed. So we've got that going for us.

A Series of Haikus

Now that Spring has sprung
I find myself awaiting
The days of Summer.

The birds that live in
The trees outside my deck are
Pretty, happy, fed.

The rain falls down in
Streaming sheets of steaming muck
Iowa is super lame and wet.

The squirrel is here
In my yard he sits and eats
Damn you, squirrel fiend.

Remembrance of Things Past

Noxema. Creosote bushes. Tomato plants. The smells of summer every one of them. Noxema - my first purchase of a beauty aid with my own money. I bought it for a trip to Grandma's house and to this day whenever I smell Noxema it reminds me of summer at Grandma's. The characteristic smell of the desert after it rains comes from the creosote bush. Even in sprawling paved metropolis of Phoenix that smell comes out after a hard rain. Some people don't like the smell, but I for one, love it. I miss that smell. I miss the feeling of monsoon season with the tantalizing hint of a warm summer rain. In the desert the rain is something to celebrate, precious because it is rare and life-giving when it comes. The smell of a summer garden will always be the smell of a tomato plant. Tangy, earthy, somehow crisp. It is the smell of promise. New life in the making.

It's amazing that particular smells are able to evoke memories. It's been found (through that science-y research nonsense) that smells are not better able to evoke memories than any of the other senses despite the general perception, but they are more emotionally charged than many other ways to evoke a memory (e.g., a picture, a sound). Smells are intricately linked to the part of our brains that deals with emotion. Smells are fairly unique in that they seem to tap primal feelings of like or dislike, approach or avoid, joy or sadness. Smells resonate within us. Tiny molecules enter our noses and start a cascade of emotions. Amazing. Fascinating. Wonderful. A little bit of therapy.

As a fun exercise, leave a comment about one of your favorite smells or one of the smells that evokes a memory for you. Tell the group what particular memory this smell conjures up for you.